Wednesday, April 24, 2013

Jumping Out of a Plane

On Saturday I rode my bike 60 miles in the North Bay of SF with my friend Kevin. We went through major climbs and made a few stops which enabled us to get done by 2pm. I was so happy to have some Saturday to enjoy. Like every week for the past 4, I fell once trying to stop and get out of my clips. It is always a bit embarrassing, but apparently everybody does it while just learning so I don’t feel too bad about it. The great thing about my falls are definitely the love I get when I return home. I get the extra doggie voodoo from Kaiser and Twix. They licked my wounds to the point where they disappeared and I had sign of injury. Although it sounds disgusting, I think it is the sweetest thing ever!

On Sunday, my sister and I went skydiving. It was truly an amazing and empowering experience. I really didn’t freak out at all until I was at the edge of the plane about the fall/drop/jump. My tandem expert partner’s name was Seva and he was from the Ukraine. Cyncere’s partner was a guy from Israel. The guys were super nice and friendly. I guess we felt indebted to them for having our lives in their hands and making sure we were alive at the end. We decided to tip them for their services. Funny enough, in terms of the actual experience, I thought it was going to be like the Freefall ride at Six Flags Magic Mountain, but instead I actually felt like I was floating. Definitely a very special moment for both Cyncere and myself. I am so happy we were able to do it.

After the skydiving, I was extra tired. Chalk it up to the 3+ hours of driving to get to and from the skydiving location, or the adrenaline high and low, or the fact that all of my surrounding co-workers have been feeling under the weather. I WAS BEAT! Sunday night and Monday night I slept almost 12 hours each. I haven’t done that since university. =)

The good thing about resting and taking it easy the last couple of days has been being able to read up on baby stuff and catch up on some trashy TV.

Last Friday, I was able to tell my surrogacy journey story to a LGBT couple that is going to get married in July. As I was talking about my journey, it got me all excited again. I, of course, sang the praises of Indian Surrogacy and especially SCI as a partner clinic. I was saddened to also talk about the new laws that were enacted. It was disappointing to have gotten them excited about a potential way to have kids but to have their excitement diminished once they learned that they could not start the process immediately. I hope that the laws will be changed soon so that potential amazing intended parents will have the opportunity to fulfill their dreams regardless of one’s ‘status’. =)

Anyway, on a more positive note, I was reading an article on Yahoo  about 8 ways how to be happy and being a parent was one of those things! It made me smile... here's the link for those interested:

Friday, April 19, 2013

Tall, Skinny Model

Yay! New communication from SCI.

Dear Anwar,

Greetings from SCI Healthcare !!
We hope this e-mail finds you well.
We would like to inform you that we have done L's scan as per our schedule.

Kindly find attached herewith the reports for the same.
We are happy to inform you that Dr. Shivani has reviewed her reports and noted that everything is fine with the same.

As per our Obstetrician's advise, L is doing fine and everything is on track with her pregnancy.
Please note that her next scan will be done within one month.

We will get back to you soon with further updates.

With Best Regards,

Ohhh how I’ve waited for this day for the past month. It is always great to hear such great news. They are currently at 17 weeks and relatively the same size, although twin2 has a femur length of 26mm (89th percentile) and an abdominal circumference of 109mm (21% percentile). This baby might be a tall, skinny model, hahahah. On a serious note, I am just happy that they are healthy. Some of the scan angles are a bit odd because you can't see the full body in some of them, but here ya go anyway:

Today I finally spoke to my HR Director about potentially taking paternity leave. She seemed very open and told me she would do more research on the matter. I guess I lucked out because California has the most open policies about taking leave (for mother AND father). Now, for sure I will be getting at least 6 weeks paid out of the 12 weeks FMLA leave. This is great news. I’m hoping that my company will be able to figure out more/different/new ways to support my leave. Overall, a really great conversation and I left feeling supported and better about taking my paternity leave.

Great news! Yesterday I made my AIDS Lifecycle Fundraising Goal of $3K! What amazing support I have received from my family and friends. All of the annoying Facebook posts I have made have actually paid off! It has been such a humbling experience. I actually pride myself on not really asking for help, but being forced to do so, has really reinforced the amazing generosity of people in my life. I still have 45 days to fundraise so I think I am going to try to get to $5K! If you do you get a special $5k fundraising shirt which only a select few actually have! New goal to achieve… yay!

Tonight, I'm having dinner with some friends of mine who are getting married in Puerto Vallarta in July, which coincidentally is my Babymoon. They are also interested in having a baby and so I will be chatting about my journey and hopefully help them navigate the crazy waters of LGBT baby-making. I'm excited for them.

Monday, April 15, 2013

Oma Needs a New Phone Background Pic!

I know I haven’t blogged in a while. I had a crazy week last week at work. It was end of the month and things got a bit hectic, coupled with the fact that I had something to do after work every night last week. Craziness! I survived the week though so I am above water at the moment.

On Wednesday, I was able to go to a LGBT Prospective Parent Potluck through the organization Our Family Coalition (God, I love living in the Bay Area). It was informative and it was just great to be in a space of LGBT parents. I got a lot of great information about resources in the area after the babies come as well as childcare options (which is a major focus at the moment). All in all, I was glad that I went to the event. Since I am further along in the process, I do believe I will be going to this group called “Mamas and Papas”.

One thing that stuck out to me that night was talking to the Program Coordinator. She was informing me that the biggest question that LGBT parents pose after having children was, “Where are all of my friends who said they would be there and support me when I had children”. I have read this before so I have mentally prepared myself for not much help from many of my gay friends here in the Bay Area. I am just thankful that my sister and Mom will be with me to help me. So thankful.

On Thursday, I was able to meet up with a friend from business school for her birthday. She had just moved with her partner and 2 year-old son from Australia. She is super excited about me having twins and has named herself top of the twin babysitting list! So funny! Her enthusiasm is totally infectious! When she told the group of people at her party about my baby news, the women were totally excited and the straight guys were totally ‘already’ overwhelmed. I thought that was sooooo funny!

This weekend, my older sister told her daughters (11 and 9 years-old) that they would be getting cousins soon. I got a call immediately from them immediately wanting to know their names. I still must call nieces back, but the excitement of their voices really warmed my heart. Also, since I brought back Indian jewelry and goodies for their mother, they have been so infatuated with the Indian culture. I can’t wait until I tell them that the babies are currently in India being well taken care of. =)

I am expecting a new report from the clinic by the end of the week. I can’t wait to see the scans. My Mom, who will be called 'Oma' (=Grandma in German) by the kids, can’t either since she has made her phone background the pic of the latest baby scans! The second trimester month-long waiting has kinda been killing me. =)

Sunday, April 7, 2013

I'm Having Twins, y'all!

Twenty fingers, Twenty toes
Plenty of work, heaven knows!
Four little arms to hold tight.
Four little cheeks to kiss night-night.

I'm having twins, y'all!
(Due Date: mid-Sept.)

That was my Facebook post this week as I revealed the pregnancy to the world. It was really amazing to get so much love from people! Here are just some of the messages!
    Miki O yey!!!
  • Patrick C Congrats. Enjoy it.
    Cheryl G Amazing!! Bye bye sleep and disposable income!
    Rhea T Absolutely thrilled for you!!!
    Karesha M YAY!!!!! So happy for you!!
    Carla F Wow...congrats!
  • Alissa M Congrats!!
    Yui S It's official. Twinsies!!
    Lonnie W Congrats Anwar!! I know you will be an amazing parent.
    Giulia M Twinsies for twinsie!!
    Ricardo F Are you going to be a father? Tell me everything about it!!!
    Ritija G What wonderful news, congratulations! Best wishes, looking forward to some adorable baby pictures in the Fall!
    Christopher R CONGRATS!!!!!!!
    Ramadan A Wow, awesome! Guess who has been keeping secrets.
  • Sora A Congrats Anwar you're going to be exhausted but you'll love it
    Peter M Awesome!! So excited for you!
    Rubina Z Anwar, congrats! You're in for more than you realize but it will be worth every second.
    Detroit R Bells yea! Congrats my friend!

    Anwar White Thank you everyone for the encouraging words. I am over the moon and can't wait for the jelly beans to come!
    Nothing but love, love, love.
    You never know how people are going to react since everything in this process is a little... let's say.... different! People were so super supportive, it was AWESOME! I even had friends tell me that they are going to be sending me all their baby books!

    The thing that touched me the most this week was chatting with a friend who is in a relationship that she really doesn't want to be in but feels she needs to settle because of her age and because she wants kids soon. She told me that hearing about my process has inspired and encouraged her to move forward and get past her fears. WOW! 

    I also chatted with another female friend who cannot have children and hearing my story inspired her as well to look into Indian surrogacy. Honestly, in the last week, I feel like I have been an ambassador to Indian Surrogacy in general and specifically my partner clinic SCI Healthcare, as I have done nothing but sing their praises!
    Next step now..... The Workplace reveal! =)


Monday, April 1, 2013

Mariah, JLo, Ricky Martin, and Me

Friday was a very productive day in terms of baby research. I spent most of the day on going over Baby 101 things as well as Baby Supply Lists. I also printed out sleep, input/output, and vaccine trackers. It is a great website and encourage all of my fellow intended parents to check it out. This week, I have planned to tell the world via Facebook about the twins and create my baby registry. I have decided not show any scans because 1) I don’t wanna be ‘that parent’ and 2) I don’t wanna be ‘that parent’. =) I’m thinking I will post a little poem about twins or refer to my divas who have had twins before me… Mariah Carey, Jennifer Lopez, and Ricky Martin. I know for a fact that the comments will be quite interesting; most people will want to know the dying question… HOW!?!

Anyway, after Cyncere and I pigged out on Hometown Buffet we were so stuffed, we passed out. I, like the Walking Dead zombie that I am, woke up at 3 in the morning and decided to look up personality kabalarian traits from first names of the kids. I will just say that I have my girls names are set but my boys names are not as set I as I would like them. Most omens and signs point to a certain name while Cyncere and myself love love love the other name. This is why I needed to look up, to get more guidance on which name I should choose. It turns out the ‘omen’ name belongs to an aggressive, rambunctious person who hates authority, whereas the other name (which I learned is traditionally female) defines a person who is a driven perfectionist who is on the materialistic side. Yikes!

Saturday I woke up early (around 6am) and drove to Sacramento to ride bikes with my friend Kevin and our FedEx teammate Louis. Kevin is the amazingly generous person who has enabled me to do the AIDS Lifecycle by loaning me a bike, clothes, gear, the works! We ended up doing 70 miles which is the longest ride I’ve been on to date. It was also fantastic practice because that was a typical daily distance for the 7-day ride event. I felt great doing it and surprisingly was too sore, just my butt bone. After the ride, the guys said I was ready for the ride and could do it tomorrow if I wanted to. That was an amazing vote of confidence and made me feel pretty ready! I can’t wait to ride out next weekend! Ohhhh MMMMM GGG, I almost forgot to tell you…. Saturday was the first ride I did with clips and biking shoes. Basically clips lock your shoe to the pedal and, in essence, make you a much more efficient rider. It takes time to get used to them because you have to have a certain technique to unlock yourself from the bike or you will tumble over while trying to stop. I will just say this…. I only fell once, but screamed like I was in a SCREAM movie while falling all the way to the ground. Can you say embarrassing??? The funny thing is that that experience weirdly made me more comfortable with the guys I was riding with and I was able to smile/laugh about it afterward.
Kevin and Me:

It rained for most of Sunday so Cyncere and I got some take out for Easter and watched a marathon of Ally McBeal all Sunday! It was the perfect relaxing day after the strenuous ride the day before. Tomorrow I should hear from the clinic about how the babies are doing (I don’t know if they are jelly beans anymore). I’m excited to see how big they have grown and if one twin is significantly larger than the other which is the case for many twins. Fingers crossed.